The Year Project: 1984 Part 2

This is the second installment of my year project for this month. If you want to know my top ten of 1984, see last week’s post. Now without further ado here are the worst movies (that I have seen) of 1984.

10. Gremlins (dir. Dante)

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So I have to admit that I actually haven’t seen a whole lot of movies from 1984. I was not alive in 1984 and by the time I was of age to watch movies and understand them, this year had fallen out of favor with most cable networks (where I saw a majority of the movies I watched when I was a kid). This is all to say that I actually like Gremlins, just not as much as the other ten that made the top. That is why it is barely on this list. The only real reason I have put it so low is that I remember it being emotionally scarring as a kid. When the gremlins turn into monsters, I nearly lost my shit they were so scary looking.

9. Sixteen Candles (dir. Hughes)


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I am all for a good romantic comedy, but this is not one of them. Sixteen Candles feels like a trial run for Pretty in Pink that would be made in two years. Both star Molly Ringwald. Both show her in high school with a weird sidekick. Both have the main character fall in love with a man who seems unattainable but is easily won over by Ringwald’s charm. There just isn’t any Ducky in this movie. Ducky is what made Pretty in Pink and clearly shows Sixteen Candles as inferior.

8. Romancing the Stone (dir. Zemeckis)

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I actually don’t have any strong feelings about this movie one way or other. It is a simple movie that moves along like clockwork, but sometimes has no life in it at all despite being set in a jungle. Nothing is more lame than a boring romantic comedy.

7. The Terminator (dir. Cameron)

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I have never really been a big fan of James Cameron’s work and this movie has got to contribute to my indifference towards him. Again this movie has no nostalgic pull for me, so I can see it for what it is which is a by the numbers action film with terrible dialogue and special effects that do not hold up to the test of time. I don’t believe that Arnold Schwarzenegger should have ever had an acting career. He lacks the charisma to put in a lead performance, even if the lead character is a robot like creature. He is boring and so is this movie.

6. Nightmare on Elm Street (dir. Craven)

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This movie started an entire franchise that I have managed to avoid for my whole life so far. (I have also never seen any of the Friday the 13th movies) While the concept is cool, never being able to sleep because the killer will come and kill you in your dreams, the execution is sloppy at best. I only found this movie scary when I was a child. As I grew up, I realized just how silly it was.

5. Revenge of the Nerds (dir. Kanew)

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I hate, hate this movie. While this movie is supposed to be pro-nerd, every little bit about it is actually making the opposite statement. The nerds are highly unlikable and annoying, they try to conform to normal society even when they have the ability to stand out and be different, and their adventures are lame at best. All this movie did was popularize pocket protectors.

4. The Karate Kid (dir. Avildsen)

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As you can tell, I was not and will never be a young boy growing up in the eighties. So this movie never once appealed to me. It just isn’t for me and neither are any of its sequels.

3. Footloose (dir. Ross)

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Wow. What an absolutely terrible movie this is. It is so incredibly hammy and full of cringe worthy eighties scenes that it is almost unwatchable. Just Google Kevin Bacon in this movie and take a gander at how tight and ill-fitting his pants are and that is all the proof I need to call this movie a terrible movie.

2. Children of the Corn (dir. Kiersch)

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When I chose this movie to review for the blogathon that I participated in on Monday, I chose wrong. I was not prepared for just how awful this movie was going to be. I had heard strange things about it with some people praising it and other people laughing at the terrible execution, and I have to say to the people who praised this movie are just plain wrong. This movie is very bad. Absolutely wretched. Like dog poop smeared on the bottom of your shoe. Just disgustingly bad.

1. C.H.U.D. (dir. Cheek)

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This movie gets the coveted number one slot for worst movie of 1984, but I have to say I did actually enjoy this movie. It isn’t good, don’t get me wrong. But I enjoyed making fun of it with my boyfriend and talking about just how excruciating every scene was. Just when you didn’t think it could get any worse, they surprised you with yet another fall down the terrible movie well. However this movie is the movie I recommend the most on this list, but only if you are drinking and prepared to make some snide comments. Do not look for quality here, you will not get it.

 

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One thought on “The Year Project: 1984 Part 2

  1. Gremlins was one of my favourite films as a kid. Haven’t seen it for a few years now, but it held up last time I saw it.

    Have to respectfully disagree with you on Elm Street. I only watched it for the first time in the last year and I was blown away by it. I think it is pretty original in the way that it combines a traditional slasher with more supernatural elements.

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